Daddy Issues

[00:00:12] Speaker A: Welcome to Spellbound, a Romantasy podcast. I'm Deidre. [00:00:15] Speaker B: And I'm Jillian. [00:00:16] Speaker A: Thanks for joining us. [00:00:17] Speaker B: How you doing? [00:00:18] Speaker A: We are just really killing it in a new room here today. The blue room. The blue room. We changed environments, and I feel like a new woman. I don't know, like you. [00:00:28] Speaker B: We've got a horse on the wall behind us. [00:00:30] Speaker A: We've got a cat. That's the interesting thing about this place is that the decor always, you know, really keeps you on your toes. Yeah. [00:00:39] Speaker B: Oh, totally. There are dogs playing poker over there. [00:00:41] Speaker A: There's a clown bathroom. [00:00:43] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, that's a little scary. [00:00:45] Speaker A: So if that's not your bag, I tell you to stay far away from this establishment. [00:00:50] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. But if it is, you come to the right place. [00:00:53] Speaker A: You got a regular, just One man fun house here at the Lincoln Lodge. How are you? How's this week been going? [00:01:00] Speaker B: Pretty good. We had our show on Friday night, which went well, though. I was thinking about this. I was like, okay, the only constant in my life right now is that in the brown room here at Lincoln Lodge, the microphone never stopped, stays up, so it never. I can't tighten it enough to stay up. [00:01:22] Speaker A: You talking about a microphone or a penis? [00:01:24] Speaker B: I know. I was just thinking. I was like, not even the tip? [00:01:28] Speaker A: No, no, no. [00:01:29] Speaker B: Yeah, no, but, like, every single time, you know? And I don't know, I think they think it's a gag, but it's not. I really just can't figure it out. [00:01:39] Speaker A: Well, let's submit that. Let's submit a ticket. [00:01:42] Speaker B: Christian. [00:01:46] Speaker A: Our resident warlock, is currently sitting in a DJ booth here behind us. It's great. I love that vibe for you, Christian. I. I don't think you have a microphone back there, but, you know. But it's all right. [00:01:55] Speaker B: He's the only one with. With headphones on. [00:01:57] Speaker A: Well, love that for him. We're winging it. Well. Yeah. Well, great. [00:02:05] Speaker B: How are you doing? [00:02:06] Speaker A: I'm doing okay. You know, it's here. Usually we record on Tuesdays, but here it's Thursday, so we're nearing the end of the week. [00:02:13] Speaker B: Yep. [00:02:15] Speaker A: Good. I've got some plans to take Birdie back to North Carolina this weekend. She's staying with her grandparents for a hot minute while I do a little bit of plopping around. I guess I just made that up. [00:02:27] Speaker B: Yep, you did. [00:02:28] Speaker A: And, you know, a little adulting, so. Good. Well, we're gonna make it work. [00:02:32] Speaker B: Some grandmother time. Grandmother, grandfather, everybody. [00:02:35] Speaker A: Yeah, everybody's gonna get some good birdie time. Oh, and then good news. [00:02:39] Speaker B: Yes. [00:02:40] Speaker A: Because we're all girls here, Christian included. [00:02:43] Speaker B: Girls included. [00:02:46] Speaker A: Birdie is. Has a clean bill of health. Like, a few weeks ago, I gave everyone the uti. The UTI diagnosis. [00:02:54] Speaker B: That's amazing. [00:02:54] Speaker A: Yeah. They called me today and they were like, sister, we don't see nothing on this report, so thank you for your thousand dollars and many two, three weeks of almost sleepless nights. But she's in the clear. [00:03:08] Speaker B: She is in the clear. You know what? I would pay a thousand dollars for that call. [00:03:12] Speaker A: Totally. Totally. Just every time. If I know that every year, like, maybe she runs the risk of one of these because they're. They're like, you know, she might run the risk of this once a year then, you know, I just need to set it aside in the budget. [00:03:25] Speaker B: Yeah, just put in the budget. Yeah. [00:03:26] Speaker A: Just be like, girl up there with, you know, now property taxes and other things once a year. There you go. There you go. [00:03:33] Speaker B: I mean, what gets me is that private equity is buying up these vets. [00:03:37] Speaker A: I know. [00:03:38] Speaker B: And that is like such a. Like that's such a thing now is like. But did you hear? Private equity is buying them up? [00:03:45] Speaker A: Yeah, they're buying everything. [00:03:47] Speaker B: Anything. You're like, oh, it's private equity. [00:03:50] Speaker A: Villains. [00:03:50] Speaker B: Villains. Yeah. [00:03:53] Speaker A: Everything is wrong. [00:03:54] Speaker B: Everything's wrong. I did want to also mention we just need to do a little In Memoriam here. [00:04:01] Speaker A: Okay. Well, that's in my. Hear. You hear? Ye. [00:04:04] Speaker B: Y. Yeah. Okay. Do you want to start? [00:04:05] Speaker A: Yeah. Should we just transition in? [00:04:08] Speaker B: Yes, let's transition in. [00:04:09] Speaker A: All right. Well, I mean, I feel like the masses have heard that we lost an icon this week. Well, a couple of icons I want to cover, too, but our beloved Diane Keaton, the muse for, I think, how we live our lives. [00:04:23] Speaker B: Oh, absolutely. [00:04:23] Speaker A: In the dayto day, just independent women. [00:04:26] Speaker B: She's what culture is to me. [00:04:27] Speaker A: You know what's interesting is Diane Keaton, like, largely looked the same to me since 1996. [00:04:34] Speaker B: Okay. I read this. Great. Did I send you their article that was like, she's not young. She's not young, but she's not old, like, at all times. [00:04:42] Speaker A: No, all the time. [00:04:43] Speaker B: Knew her. That was. Yeah. [00:04:44] Speaker A: I actually found her to look younger, as in her older years. [00:04:48] Speaker B: Me, too. [00:04:49] Speaker A: Because I'll tell you something. You know, number one, my favorite Diane Keaton movie is the First Wives Club. Yeah. Through and through. Multiple things that she's been in that are wonderful acts, but that's kind of the beacon for me. But another film that really raised me as a child was Father the Bride, Part two. Specifically Part two. Specifically. And I was thinking about the other day because I'm like, you know, when that movie came out, I was young, so I wasn't really thinking. I just knew that like their daughter Annie was pregnant. And somehow Diane Keaton also got pregnant in that movie. So at the same time, the daughter and the mother were both pregnant. And that just caused a lot of like anxiety and chaos for Steve Martin, who was the both the husband to Diane Keaton and the father to, you know, the daughter. Anyway, I'm thinking to myself, okay, so she played a woman that was obviously childbearing years. She did not look like a childbearing woman in that film in 1996 to me. Like, she looked way beyond childbearing years in that movie. But she, she was only supposed to be 46 in that film. [00:05:55] Speaker B: Oh, okay. But she looked in her 50s. [00:05:57] Speaker A: She looked way older. But that's because, you know, people back then, you know, right. You were 36. You look like aged milk sitting out on the patio in the hot sun. [00:06:05] Speaker B: Right, right, right. But not. But like in recent years, she looked. No, no older than 60. [00:06:12] Speaker A: No 100%. [00:06:13] Speaker B: I know, that's pretty wild. [00:06:14] Speaker A: That's what happens when you're unproblematic. You know what I mean? [00:06:18] Speaker B: When your soul is clean. [00:06:19] Speaker A: Yeah. When your soul is clean, you age, aging slows, or just straight up goes backwards. [00:06:25] Speaker B: And then Al Pacino and Woody Allen. [00:06:27] Speaker A: Are just talk about what the is going on. Keep your mouth shut. [00:06:31] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, no, I know. [00:06:33] Speaker A: It's not enough, like we don't care that this woman is about to, you know, however they're, whatever they're going to do for her remains. [00:06:40] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:06:41] Speaker A: Whether she's going to go in the ground, whether she's going to go into, you know, the ashes and be spread to the wind. Possibly in my choice. [00:06:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:06:49] Speaker A: Who, who whatever you coming now. And when she can no longer hear or see these words and say, she was the love of my life. My biggest regret is not marrying her. It's such a boy move. You are too old. [00:07:00] Speaker B: It is the ultimate boy move. [00:07:03] Speaker A: How are you 90 years old and still acting like this? I'm like, not you out here saying this when you literally just had a baby with like a 28 year old woman or something A couple years ago, wasn't it? [00:07:14] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Like a couple years ago. Yeah. I mean, one thing I was thinking too is that like, you know, everybody's coming out like lauding her fashion sense and being like, you know, it was just so ahead of its time when, like, when she was wearing it. They would make fun of it. [00:07:29] Speaker A: Yeah. That's trash. [00:07:29] Speaker B: Everybody was like, oh, what is she doing? When she was wearing like 17 skirts to the Academy Awards. But she's doing her. God love her. Yeah. [00:07:38] Speaker A: We'll miss her. [00:07:39] Speaker B: We'll miss her. We are going to miss her. [00:07:41] Speaker A: This one hurt a lot of people. [00:07:42] Speaker B: It really did. I mean, they are, like, still coming out with, like, articles and essays. [00:07:47] Speaker A: I know. I mean, just great. Sad. Really sad loss. We thought it was gonna be Dolly Parton there for a minute. [00:07:53] Speaker B: Oh. Oh, my God. I was preparing for that. [00:07:56] Speaker A: I know. Which is so weird that we thought it was gonna be Dolly Parton. Then it was Diane Keaton. Another D. And then here's D'. Angelo. What's going on? [00:08:06] Speaker B: He was so young. [00:08:07] Speaker A: 51 is just a baby. [00:08:09] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:08:10] Speaker A: So young. [00:08:11] Speaker B: It was pancreatic cancer, right? [00:08:12] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. [00:08:13] Speaker B: Not to be a W downer. [00:08:14] Speaker A: I know, I know. It's awful. And then they. They revealed that Diane Keatons was pneumonia. Yeah. [00:08:21] Speaker B: That was bizarre. [00:08:22] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:08:23] Speaker B: Because it was. Surprise. It was like a huge surprise. [00:08:25] Speaker A: Yeah. So sad. [00:08:27] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:08:28] Speaker A: But yeah, d'. Angelo. So sad. Wonderful music. An icon in his own right. [00:08:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:08:34] Speaker A: I think just universally seen as one of the most gorgeous men we've ever laid eyes on. [00:08:39] Speaker B: Oh. And right after that music video, he's like, I can't do this. [00:08:42] Speaker A: Yeah. He's. Well, somebody was like, you know, after he got so much attention over that video, it's just. It took the joy of performing out of it because people were, you know, basically just minimizing him to his physical traits. [00:08:58] Speaker B: Right. Well, welcome to all women. [00:09:02] Speaker A: Exactly. I was scrolling through social media and, you know, seeing some of the tributes that were put out there. And our beloved friend Nathan had posted, I guess, a it to a story, a video of d', Angelo's, you know, how does it feel? Video. And above it, he was like. He's like. He's like paying tribute to my gay awakening. [00:09:25] Speaker B: Yeah, I know. I knew he was gonna say that. [00:09:28] Speaker A: And I'm like, yeah, absolutely love that for you. That's a wonderful awakening. God. [00:09:34] Speaker B: Yeah, it's really sad. [00:09:36] Speaker A: So sad. We usually don't like to have here. Ye hear ye's beyond a set. Nope. But those are a couple things. Another thing that I want to talk about is I've. I've mentioned this before. I feel like this season on the podcast, we've mentioned on a number of occasions. Both are limited use would say relative. Relative to the broader public, from what I can see. And also our Fascination and fear of artificial intelligence. So scary. [00:10:02] Speaker B: I'm so scared. Oh, don't tell me. What are you going to say? [00:10:05] Speaker A: Okay, so there was an article that came out and I was reading it and I was a little bit like, I feel like I've. I don't think I've talked about this on the podcast before. I certainly was talking about AI chatbots. [00:10:16] Speaker B: Oh, you're talking about the open AI thing announcement this week. [00:10:21] Speaker A: You can totally give me some more context on that here in a minute. No, this is an article from the Cut from a couple of weeks ago, an article by Anna Louise Sussman and it's called AI is making Online Dating Even Worse. What happens when users are inundated with machine generated profiles and pickup lines? Now, this does not apply to me because I am not on the dating apps. It's crazy. But essentially this article is talking about how online dating has, to everyone's surprise, gotten worse. [00:10:54] Speaker B: Yeah, everyone shocked. [00:10:55] Speaker A: How, how can we keep getting lower? And essentially the article is talking about how, you know, since the launch of Chat GPT, different users are finding that they're coming across communications with people that they match with on the apps that, that sound just way too formal and like chatbots, essentially. So they'll say, oh, well, tell me your idea of a perfect date. And the response will be so ornate. [00:11:30] Speaker B: Right, right. [00:11:30] Speaker A: And not in the way that a human being would normally speak. And so there's sort of this conversation about how, you know, in a lot of instances, women are finding when they're interacting with men, they're not getting genuine respons back. It's almost as though the men are putting their responses into Chat GPT and then putting that into the response because they're not really confident about their written word. [00:11:56] Speaker B: I gotta say, I get it, you're. [00:11:59] Speaker A: Right that you're not wrong here. [00:12:01] Speaker B: I think, I think I'd rather talk to the chat bot then talk to. [00:12:04] Speaker A: Well, a lot of women. A lot of women feel that way and it's so frustrating. So essentially nobody's talking to each other even on the apps. They're talking to fake people and nobody knows what's real, who's real, what's going on. And yeah, it's a very interesting article. Essentially my walk, my, my takeaway was we just need to log off. [00:12:28] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:12:29] Speaker A: And touch grass and learn how to look people in the eyes and have a conversation. [00:12:34] Speaker B: Yep. Learn how to call people. [00:12:36] Speaker A: Learn how to call people. Learn how to call and make an appointment. You know, one thing I was thinking about this week, I'm like, you know, I think we talked about flirting in our last episode, and I think, like, I think I just don't subscribe to what is seen as the. The broad idea of flirtation. Right. It's like the shyness. It's the glances across the room. I don't think I do well with that. I think I'm better at just, like, directly joking with someone. You know what I mean? Like, let's just work through that. I get very anxious and nervous when somebody's just, like, looking at me from across the room. I don't play the demure shy role very well, and I think that's where things are, you know, kind of problematic to me. This is a little bit why I don't think Chat GPT like, is. Would work for me on a. A dating app. [00:13:26] Speaker B: I think we do. [00:13:27] Speaker A: We have a mouse, we have a ghost. That's why I don't think Chat GPT would necessarily work. [00:13:33] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, for me. [00:13:34] Speaker A: Or maybe it would. I don't know. [00:13:35] Speaker B: A chat GPT for what? [00:13:37] Speaker A: Flirting with someone? Communicating with somebody over the app. [00:13:39] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, No, I can see that. Yeah. No, I mean, honestly, though, like, if you've talked to men on dating apps, it's like, that would be a relief. [00:13:49] Speaker A: Well, I think people are also getting frustrated because it just feels like chat. It just feels like chat bot slop on the apps because everybody's biographies sound the same. What everybody's looking for sounds the same. Like, they're all using the same kind of responses. That Chat GPT is just cranking out, and there's no originality in it whatsoever. [00:14:11] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Well, meanwhile, so this week was announced. Open. Open. AI said that basically they're going to institute, like, a, you know, an age limit, and if you just put in that you're over 18, then you can have your chat. You can, like. What is it called? Like, you can design your chap GPT to be, like, you know, some, like, porn star. [00:14:35] Speaker A: Oh, God. Yeah, we're really in for it. That's like me going to, like, the Budweiser website when I was, like, 10 years old, and all you got to do is say, hey, I was born in 1978. And they let you in. There's like, what? It's a joke. [00:14:50] Speaker B: I know. It's a total joke. Yeah, yeah. [00:14:52] Speaker A: But, yeah, I know. I was watching in, like, a docu series or a new series not too long ago, and there's this debate and this conversation among different states about what they need to do in Terms of setting age limits for accessing porn websites. So if you're in certain states and you try and go to, you know, whatever your friendly neighborhood porn website is, right. It will block you unless you, like, provide some form of identification. So now that's getting into the whole question of, like, oh, people don't want to, like, give their ID and like, you know, whatever other states, you can just get on there anytime, day or night and whatever. I'm like. I'm a little bit like, you need to be able to show a fucking form of ID to use. Chat GPT. [00:15:38] Speaker B: Oh, I think so. You know what I saw Brandon Johnson is doing? Taxing social media somehow. Yeah. [00:15:46] Speaker A: Well, he's gotta find some way to. To get this budget together. You know, I pay in close attention. I'm like, don't be bringing no more of those property taxes in here. He's like, that's not part of the plan. It better not be. [00:16:00] Speaker B: It's like, all right, tax the social media usage. [00:16:02] Speaker A: Yeah, I won't get on there. [00:16:03] Speaker B: No, I know, but he was basically like, you know, nicotine and tobacco's tax. So why isn't this other addictive? Same tax. [00:16:10] Speaker A: It's so addictive to people. [00:16:12] Speaker B: I know, it's bad. [00:16:13] Speaker A: I hate it. [00:16:14] Speaker B: Me too. [00:16:15] Speaker A: I just want to get offline. I was. I saw something the other day where this girl said that she was in a cafe, and this group of young, like, you know, girls in their late teens, probably early 20s, came to her and asked her if she could take their picture, and they gave her a digital camera. You know, those are making a comeback now. So anyway, they gave this girl who's like our age the camera, and they go, oh, you just press the button at the top. [00:16:41] Speaker B: She was probably like, yeah, I get it. I know. [00:16:43] Speaker A: She goes. She goes, thank you. I was alive in 2008. Like, you don't even know. You don't know the paths we carved out for y'. [00:16:54] Speaker B: All. Yeah, totally. [00:16:55] Speaker A: We would go out, we'd have a flip phone in one hand. We'd have a digital camera on, like, the little loop around our wrist on. [00:17:02] Speaker B: The other, or disposable. [00:17:04] Speaker A: By the time I was in college, I was like, let me get this digital camera together. I had, like, a little. God, what was it? I don't know. I can't remember the brand. But it had, like a sliding, like, sort of door over the front. [00:17:18] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:17:18] Speaker A: And you turn that bad boy on. [00:17:20] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. You had that around your wrist. Yeah, yeah, we're out there blurriest. Pictures. It's great. [00:17:26] Speaker A: The most horrible picture. I, you know, my college roommate Courtney, God bless her, she's one of the most organized people I've ever met in my life. And she is basically like a timekeeper, essentially. And when we were in Amsterdam back in May, she. We were out of the cocktail bar having a drink, and she revealed to me that she has very much widely organized all of our photographs. Any photograph that she's taken since. Since I've known her. So since 2006. Fully archived and organized. [00:17:59] Speaker B: No way. [00:18:00] Speaker A: In her. She's got it in, like, a clothing cloud. You know, she pays for, like, an external cloud service, essentially. And so she logged in on her phone. She, like, navigated over to her, like, 2006 folder. She opened it up. It's, like, organized. Organized by month, essentially. She goes in there and, like, pulling up pictures I haven't seen in almost 20 years now. For me, I was like, burn it. Yeah, burn it now. [00:18:25] Speaker B: Some things are meant to stay buried. Yeah. [00:18:28] Speaker A: But, you know, if they bring her joy. [00:18:29] Speaker B: Absolutely. It's like, don't show me. But. Yeah. [00:18:33] Speaker A: But I am at least glad that there is a time, like, now I take pictures on my iPhone and they feel so. I don't know. I don't think. I just don't think about it right. Anymore. After I take a picture on my. Whereas, like, taking pictures on the disposable camera or on our digital, like, dedicated cameras, it felt like, you know, you're taking this for the purpose of, like, taking pictures that you actually. Totally, totally. [00:18:55] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. I tell the kids, you know, and by the kids, I mean my nieces and nephews, that I'm like, okay, we'll take a picture, but then you're not going to see it for a week. Yeah, I'm not going to show it to you for a week because they're automatically. I want to see it. I want to see it. It's like, that's really not doing good things for you. [00:19:12] Speaker A: It's so crazy that, like, now we have kids who, like, fully expect. [00:19:15] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:19:16] Speaker A: Pictures immediately once they're taken. Whereas, like, when we were growing up with digital. Not digital, but disposable. Before digital cameras. Because I would say. What. Digital cameras came out around the time we were in middle school, like, late elementary. Middle. [00:19:29] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. In digital, you mean, like, there was still, like, an SD card in it or. Okay. It didn't go straight to your phone? [00:19:35] Speaker A: No. [00:19:35] Speaker B: Okay. Okay. [00:19:36] Speaker A: We didn't have that until, like, 2007. [00:19:38] Speaker B: Yeah. Digital. [00:19:40] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:19:40] Speaker B: I mean, they used to be, like, really expensive. [00:19:43] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:19:43] Speaker B: And then. Yeah. [00:19:44] Speaker A: I mean, we had cameras on our early cell phones in, like, the early 2000s, like 2000 when I was in high school. All of my, you know, phones that I had had a camera, but they were grainy as hell, like, awful. So you needed to use a dedicated digital camera. And then once the iPhone, like, came around and, like, really got it together, everybody just used their. [00:20:02] Speaker B: I. Yeah, we were all fucked when. When Steve Jobs stood up there and introduced the iPhone. That huge brick. [00:20:11] Speaker A: Yeah. The first person to ever have it going. Courtney Patricia. Yeah, she's the first one. [00:20:15] Speaker B: There you go. [00:20:15] Speaker A: She brought it to campus, and I was like, girl, what is that? And then, sure enough, years later, I just can't go back. She was the first influencer. [00:20:25] Speaker B: Oh, my God. She really was. Yeah. [00:20:27] Speaker A: Good for her. [00:20:28] Speaker B: Good for her. All right, let me. Are we. Do you have any more hear you, hear you? [00:20:33] Speaker A: I don't think I have any more Hear you, hear you. This week. I am, you know, I'm anglin for just the tip. [00:20:39] Speaker B: Okay. I'm gonna find it, and I will. [00:20:43] Speaker A: I'm gonna die laughing when we listen back to this, and it's gonna be your fingers typing on the microphone and not your voice. [00:20:52] Speaker B: Okay, well, now that I am in my computer. Okay. So this week we read the Assassin's Blade by Sarah J. Maas. Our favorite, which is. It's a series of five prequel novellas that take place before the events of Throne of Glass. [00:21:11] Speaker A: Yes. [00:21:12] Speaker B: So it was published in March 2014. Check in. Where were you in March 2014? [00:21:17] Speaker A: Oh, I was a mess. Where was. I was. I think I was starting to make my initial descent out of messiness. [00:21:27] Speaker B: Oh, okay. [00:21:28] Speaker A: Really? It wasn't for a long time. We didn't land for a long time, but I think I was starting. I think by that point, the first trigger was, like, moving out of the apartment that I had shared with someone for the last three years. So that was, like, when I started to be, like, okay, in the next few months, I'm gonna have to, like, move out of here and, like, figure out what my next thing is. [00:21:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:21:48] Speaker A: So that was sort of the first foray into, like, kind of getting it together. But trust me, it was messy for. For much longer. [00:21:54] Speaker B: A little bit longer. [00:21:55] Speaker A: Yeah. I was still in the tornado. [00:21:56] Speaker B: Oh, for sure. For sure. Yeah. I mean, I was thinking about it because, you know, we were reading this book, and I'll, you know, talk about it later, but, like, at one point, they're in the club, and I was like, well, that was me in 2014. [00:22:10] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:22:10] Speaker B: I mean, just doing laps. You want to do a lap? [00:22:13] Speaker A: You know, I would pay good money for somebody to put me in a time machine and go back to what club you were at doing laps. Because I probably would step out of the time machine and be like, what are you doing here? [00:22:25] Speaker B: Get out of here. This is not. [00:22:26] Speaker A: This is not for you, Jillian. I'd be like, you're too pure. You're too pure, Jillian. [00:22:32] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Every time I walked in there, I was like, I don't belong here. [00:22:36] Speaker A: I, I, I need to go back and ask questions. I need to do a full Just postmortem. Like, what's going on? [00:22:46] Speaker B: Can you imagine? Like, so like, I went out to a club or a bar or whatever, and then the next morning, I, like, would go and, like, see my sister, and she'd be like, what are you doing with your life? [00:22:57] Speaker A: Yeah, I need to go back to those years just to be like, where are we? What's going on here? [00:23:03] Speaker B: My parents were like, she'll be okay. [00:23:05] Speaker A: They were like, God bless. [00:23:09] Speaker B: Oh, my God. All right, so this is technically the third book in the series by publication order, but some folks like to read it first to understand our main character Selena Sardothian's villain origin story. [00:23:24] Speaker A: Love a villain origin story. [00:23:25] Speaker B: Love it, love it. Like very Batman a little bit in this, in this book. So others like us to insert, like others like us insert it. You can tell that did you wrote. [00:23:38] Speaker A: This and I read it. Somebody would probably read that and go, this is chat GPT. Because it's got punctuation. [00:23:44] Speaker B: Yes. [00:23:44] Speaker A: Y' all are not gonna take me down. [00:23:46] Speaker B: I mean. Yeah, yeah. Basically, we're all we're going to be seeing as jbt just because we can spell. [00:23:52] Speaker A: And literacy rates are falling. [00:23:55] Speaker B: Oh, my God. I can't even talk about it. Okay. So anyway, so some people read it first, some people read it second, and some people read it third. [00:24:06] Speaker A: Sure. [00:24:08] Speaker B: Okay, here's. Are you ready for just a chat? [00:24:10] Speaker A: Let's go. [00:24:11] Speaker B: All right. I'm not going full bore. It might be about 50%. That's all right. [00:24:16] Speaker A: Okay, here we go. [00:24:18] Speaker B: So the first novella starts us off in Skulls Bay, where Araban Hamau. So the king, the assassin. [00:24:25] Speaker A: And this is the assassin and the pirate lord. That's the first one, right? [00:24:28] Speaker B: Okay. Yeah. So where Araban. Araban has sent Selena and Sam Cortland a king king. Okay. Sam and Selina have grown up together in the assassin's keep and have been rivals to the heir to be the heir apparent to Erebin. [00:24:44] Speaker A: Yes. [00:24:46] Speaker B: So they meet this pirate, they go to this Skulls bay, and they meet this pirate lord, Captain Rolf. Rolf. A man with serious potential. [00:24:54] Speaker A: He's got some potential. I have some serious questions. [00:24:57] Speaker B: Serious questions, right? Yeah. But he's got like. It's full tattoos. Like I think full arm and hand tattoos of the changing tides, which is pretty hot. But anyway, they realized that Arabin has made a deal with Ralph to trade a whole ship of slaves. [00:25:15] Speaker A: And that's where it ends. Yeah, that's where the potential ends for me. I was waiting for maybe the. The tides to turn. [00:25:21] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:25:22] Speaker A: With our dear beloved Rolf. [00:25:24] Speaker B: But didn't happen. [00:25:25] Speaker A: No. My man is out here selling humans. [00:25:28] Speaker B: No. [00:25:28] Speaker A: No humans. [00:25:29] Speaker B: Yep. Maybe. Maybe he'll. He'll make a comeback and like, he won't actually have been like a villain. He'll be. [00:25:36] Speaker A: Maybe. [00:25:36] Speaker B: We'll see. Okay. Selena decides that she's gonna. [00:25:42] Speaker A: But for the time being, as a black woman, I must stand. Yeah, I can't stand in. You're like. It remains to be seen. [00:25:55] Speaker B: Okay, so Selena decides that she's going to free them and free the slaves. And Sam helps her by creating a diversion and starting a town wide brawl while they both row out to the ships with the slaves. Prior to making this decision, they tussle in the sand in a scene that can only be described as reminiscent of both the 1978 musical Grease, starring John Travolta and Olivia Newton John. Crossed with the football scene in the 1991 cult classic Point Break. [00:26:27] Speaker A: Okay. [00:26:27] Speaker B: Starring. You see where I'm going? Patrick Swayze and my one true love, Keanu Reeves. Do you see that? [00:26:33] Speaker A: Yeah. Well, you know, I think we talked about this recently. I've seen bits and pieces of Point Break. I haven't seen it. And it like sat down and watched it. And it's full, full glory to like. [00:26:43] Speaker B: Watch it in a movie. Movie theater. [00:26:44] Speaker A: Patrick Swayze's hair. You know, I love a white man with good hair. [00:26:49] Speaker B: No, you do. I know that shag. [00:26:53] Speaker A: I mean, if that's Captain Rolf. Yep. [00:26:56] Speaker B: Although I think he would be more like Kiana. Keanu. Keanu. [00:27:00] Speaker A: Keanu. What with like darker features. [00:27:03] Speaker B: Keanu is like, if. If any time I can't like, you know, imagine one of these book boyfriends. I'm like, well, it's kano them. [00:27:10] Speaker A: Wow. There's a lot of Keanu's running around. [00:27:12] Speaker B: A lot of them. Yeah, a lot of them. So anyway, okay, so they succeed in freeing the two ships of slaves and somehow. And and something has now changed with both Selina and Sam. Right. Yeah. Second novella. [00:27:25] Speaker A: There's a stirring. There's a stirring in the loins. [00:27:27] Speaker B: There's a stirring in the loins, in the core. [00:27:30] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. It's liquefying. [00:27:34] Speaker B: So the second novella was actually pretty boring. The one with the healer. The assassin and the healer, Selena has been beaten very badly by Araban and has been dispatched to go and learn with the mute assassin king. No big deal. On her way, she stops by an inn, meets a healer, teaches her self defense. And that's pretty much it. [00:27:54] Speaker A: I. I did like that story, though. [00:27:56] Speaker B: You did? [00:27:56] Speaker A: I did. I mean, it was born. I mean, relative to the other stories, but I did feel for the healer and I did like that Selena taught her self defense tactics and then the. [00:28:09] Speaker B: End, like, gave her all the money so that she could go. [00:28:11] Speaker A: Yes. It was a feel good story. [00:28:12] Speaker B: Right. And we needed that. You know, this was like pretty heavy, but I do think it was mostly setting up this character Arene, who seems like a character that's going to come back. Yeah. Anyway, okay, so the third Nolla, the assassin in the Red Desert. [00:28:29] Speaker A: My favorite. [00:28:30] Speaker B: Is it their favorite? [00:28:31] Speaker A: It was. Yeah. Yeah. I think just in terms of like the. Well, first of all, there was no, like, major devastating death in this one and. Yeah. And I thought that, like, visually it was. Oh, it was. [00:28:48] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:48] Speaker A: It was stunning in my mind's eye. [00:28:50] Speaker B: Yeah, No, I thought so too. And I thought that the. I thought the like Karate Kid part of it where these. So anyway, this, the assassin, the mute assassin king, teaches Selena, like how to move like a animal. [00:29:06] Speaker A: Yeah, like an asp. [00:29:07] Speaker B: Like a. Like an asp or a bat or a jackrabbit. So that's pretty cool. But. So she teaches her king, teaches Selina some pretty badass moves, but she also meets this. Makes this friend, Ansel, who then betrays her and tries to kill the king. [00:29:27] Speaker A: Not a girl's girl. [00:29:27] Speaker B: Not a girl's girl. And also I think. But I do think she was like a little bit. Had a crush on Selena. What do you think? [00:29:35] Speaker A: Perhaps. [00:29:36] Speaker B: I thought so. [00:29:37] Speaker A: I just wasn't feeling her at all. [00:29:38] Speaker B: I wasn't. Yeah, no, she was like, too, too, like, positive. And yeah, bubbly. Okay. So anyway, she saves the king's life and he gives her a bunch of gold so that she can pay Ereban back and leave the guild. [00:29:52] Speaker A: Let's also note that he has kind of a hot sun. [00:29:56] Speaker B: He has a very hot. A very hot sign who's mute. But I didn't Mind it. [00:30:02] Speaker A: Yeah, Keep your mouth shut. [00:30:09] Speaker B: Just keep a chat. [00:30:10] Speaker A: Don't say not a peep. [00:30:15] Speaker B: Oh, my God. He was. Hopefully he comes back. [00:30:17] Speaker A: Yeah, I think so. [00:30:19] Speaker B: Okay, so the last two books broke my heart, and I'm having a hard time currently at 10pm on Wednesday night. [00:30:25] Speaker A: Yeah, that's what I wrote. Yeah. [00:30:28] Speaker B: But I'm going to attempt to talk about it. So, essentially, the fourth novella, The Healer. [00:30:33] Speaker A: In the Underworld or the Assassin in the Underworld? [00:30:35] Speaker B: The Assassin in the World. [00:30:36] Speaker A: It would be great to see the Healer in the Underworld. There's a lot of work to do down there. [00:30:40] Speaker B: Yeah, maybe. Maybe the next couple. So the fourth novella is about a contract that Erebin sends Selina on to kill this guy because he says that he's a slave trader. [00:30:53] Speaker A: Yeah. I'll choke you up every time. [00:30:59] Speaker B: Don't want to say it. Yeah. Spoiler alert. Arabin is a sadistic fascist, and the guy she was actually. She killed was actually trying to help abolish the trade. [00:31:11] Speaker A: Yes. A Quaker. [00:31:13] Speaker B: A Quaker, Yeah. [00:31:15] Speaker A: So a countryman. [00:31:16] Speaker B: A country. [00:31:19] Speaker A: For love of country. [00:31:19] Speaker B: For the love of country. [00:31:22] Speaker A: He's putting country before party, that's for sure. [00:31:24] Speaker B: Yes, yes, yes. So, okay, so in the meantime, Selena and Sam get closer, and he admits that he's loved her for years and that when Arabin beat her after Skulls Bay, after they freed the slaves, he made Sam watch because he knew Sam loved her. Oh, God. I can't even. Yeah, so Sam says he has to leave because if he stays, it'll end up killing Arabin for what he did to her. [00:31:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:31:52] Speaker B: So they decide to move into her apartment, and Selena sells her horse to pay off Sam's death. [00:31:57] Speaker A: I hated that horse having to go. [00:31:58] Speaker B: I mean, me, too. Even when she knew that she was selling her, like the horse to a bad lady. [00:32:04] Speaker A: Couldn't do it. [00:32:05] Speaker B: Didn't like it. [00:32:05] Speaker A: No. [00:32:06] Speaker B: Okay. The last novella is a stab in the heart. [00:32:10] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:11] Speaker B: And I went into it as if I was standing in front of a VCR, putting in the VHS tape of the 1991 tragedy My Girl. [00:32:19] Speaker A: Oh, you knew what was gonna happen. Where's his glasses? [00:32:22] Speaker B: He can't see without his glasses. [00:32:25] Speaker A: Thomas J. Thomas J. I think I was devastated in the movie theater. [00:32:34] Speaker B: I mean, my life changed. [00:32:35] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:36] Speaker B: I'll tell you, a couple times in my life changed. One was My Girl. The Second one was 9 11. I mean, it was right up there. [00:32:43] Speaker A: I mean, both national tragedies, frankly. [00:32:49] Speaker B: Okay, so we all know the ending that. The ending that was coming. [00:32:53] Speaker A: And this is the assassin. And the continent. [00:32:56] Speaker B: Okay. Yes. I didn't even know that it was called. I just kept. [00:32:59] Speaker A: You were just. You were just flipping through. I just say that? No, you're doing a great job. I'm just saying that as, like, a reference point. Should people be like, where is this happening? What are we doing? [00:33:11] Speaker B: Okay, so we all knew where the ending was coming, and I'm not sure why we did it to ourselves. I actually was reading on Reddit afterward, and there was a woman that was like, if you love yourself, don't read it. [00:33:21] Speaker A: It's bad. [00:33:23] Speaker B: But okay, but here we are. So, basically, Sam and Selena decide to leave the Assassin's Guild and move to another continent. But first, they need money. Yeah, Sam. [00:33:33] Speaker A: I was like, not y'. All Struggling for whatever reason. That took a little wind out of my romantic sails for them, because I was like, I don't like a struggle. [00:33:42] Speaker B: You were like, I like this apartment. [00:33:44] Speaker A: We have to figure it out. [00:33:48] Speaker B: So Sam gets a contract to kill a crime lord and his psychopath assistant, Ferran. Arabin is weird and begs Selena to stay, and she and the rest of us are confused as to infinite his intentions. Like, is he like a father to her or in love with her? [00:34:04] Speaker A: She asked the same thing. [00:34:05] Speaker B: Or what's going on? Yeah. Anyway, Sam insists on going after the psychopath assistant himself and doesn't come back. [00:34:13] Speaker A: Yeah. You knew what time it was. [00:34:15] Speaker B: Selena waits for him the whole night and is finally told by Arabin that Faran killed Sam. All of a sudden, we are at the end of the 1972 film that is every man's favorite topic of the. Of conversation. What? What is every man's favorite topic of conversation? [00:34:32] Speaker A: The Godfather. [00:34:32] Speaker B: The Godfather. [00:34:33] Speaker A: Yeah, the Godfather. [00:34:35] Speaker B: The Godfather. So Lena tries to get revenge, but caught, put on trial and sent to Endovier. [00:34:41] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:34:42] Speaker B: And we learned that Arabin set the whole thing up because he doesn't like sharing his belongings. To which I say in the. The voice of Diane Keaton, you don't own me. [00:34:54] Speaker A: Yeah, there you go. [00:34:55] Speaker B: You know what I mean? Bringing it back now. We're done. [00:35:01] Speaker A: We're done. You really did God's work on this one. [00:35:04] Speaker B: Great job. What'd you think? I. I put in, like, a bunch of movies in there. I was proud of myself. [00:35:09] Speaker A: It's great. [00:35:10] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:35:10] Speaker A: Those are great movies. Great films. I love that. Yeah. I love this book. I love these little novellas. Yeah, it was fun. It was an adventure. It was a little bit of a choose your own adventure. And enough, like, change in scenery and characters and whatever to keep the story. Interesting. [00:35:27] Speaker B: Yeah. And I really liked that because Selena did get really annoying in the end. [00:35:32] Speaker A: We could talk about it. [00:35:33] Speaker B: Like, we needed. Yeah, we needed a little variety to, like, be able to handle her. [00:35:37] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah, totally. Yeah. Really great. I think we read it at the right time. We were the people that read it as. As we start. We went ahead and already started the book series. We didn't read it at the start, but I actually am glad that we did it in the way that we did, because I think if I had started with this book, I wouldn't have appreciated all the context and I. [00:35:59] Speaker B: Right. And I also would not have wanted to finish the series. [00:36:02] Speaker A: Yeah, probably not. [00:36:04] Speaker B: Because can you imagine, like, you know, reading about Sam, then being devastated and then getting stuck with Kale and Rowan? No. [00:36:13] Speaker A: I mean, I'm mad that we've got, like four books left with them, to be honest. [00:36:17] Speaker B: Five. [00:36:17] Speaker A: Five. Do we? [00:36:18] Speaker B: No, Four. Four. [00:36:19] Speaker A: Yeah, it's eight. [00:36:21] Speaker B: So what do you love? What do you leave? [00:36:22] Speaker A: Okay. Got a little hot to try. Okay, let me go up here. All right, number one, we're starting off strong. Samuel Cortland. [00:36:33] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:36:35] Speaker A: Samuel Cortland. Okay, here's the things that I jotted down about Sam Cortland. We could talk about these as we go through them. I think of all the male characters that we've met in the series so far, he's easily been my favorite. [00:36:49] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. For sure. [00:36:50] Speaker A: He doesn't turn away from Selena or who she truly is. And that's something she struggled with from Kale and even her white haired cousin. [00:36:59] Speaker B: Yeah. Rowan. Oh. I was like, how many cousins? There are a bunch of cousins. [00:37:06] Speaker A: I can't even talk about it. I also, there were just things that he said, said, and did that are just so ridiculous. Like, I'll say something. I'll say a quote that undid me, and it's so silly. But it was just. I don't know. But anyway, I died when they went to the theater and the music started up and kind of drowned him out. And he leaned into her saying, you look beautiful, though I bet you already know that. Swoon. That's what I wrote. [00:37:36] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:37:37] Speaker A: Also the fact that he introduced her to telling herself, I will not be afraid. [00:37:42] Speaker B: Stop. I will die. I will die. That was like my favorite. That I am Sam Cortland. And when he was like, she said, wait, something. I wrote something here. She said, will you laugh at me if I say I'm scared? And he goes, no, never. [00:37:56] Speaker A: Yeah. Just a sweet boy. [00:37:59] Speaker B: Sweet, sweet. [00:38:00] Speaker A: And you know what? I think it is. Is that he had kind of a tough upbringing. [00:38:04] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:38:05] Speaker A: That gave him perspective. And his mom was mercilessly murdered by a jealous man. And so he just had this empathy for women and the underdog. [00:38:17] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. He really did. I mean, he was always. Because his mom was a sex worker, so he was always, like, trying to protect sex workers. [00:38:25] Speaker A: Yeah. He just didn't like women being abused. [00:38:27] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:38:29] Speaker A: I love it. I loved it, too. I think it's great. You know, at one thing, one point, I thought about Mikey. He says to her. He turns to her and says, when we die, do you think we'll be punished for the things we've done? And that made me think about Mikey. Do you think we're ever truly forgiven? It was a definite Mikey moment. We also need to talk about him gifting her with sheet music. Oh, my God. So they're. Selena is a huge classical music fan. She's a fan of the theater. She likes fancy things. Yeah. She's a theater girl. [00:39:08] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:39:08] Speaker A: And they go to the theater one night, and she is deeply moved by the music that's being played. And Sam Cortland, being the thoughtful king that he is, goes out of his way to surprise her with sheet music so that she can play it on her own piano forte. [00:39:25] Speaker B: Right away. He had, like, two hours. [00:39:27] Speaker A: Yeah. And he finagled his connections and his people in the city of Rift hold in order to get her just. Just because. Gift. [00:39:37] Speaker B: Yep. Yep. [00:39:38] Speaker A: Because he thought. He knew she cared about it so much. [00:39:41] Speaker B: Wrapped it up in a ribbon. And she was so awful to him. [00:39:45] Speaker A: She was terrible. She's terrible. We'll get to that. [00:39:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:39:50] Speaker A: Okay. I'll say. Okay. I'll say these two last quotes. He goes to her. The only secret I've born my entire life is that I love you. Because they're talking about their secrets, and I think she's wanting to reveal, you know, her whole background and her story that she's biracial. [00:40:07] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:40:10] Speaker A: Spicing. There is a quote, and it's so simple, but it, like, touched me. He looks at her and he goes, have lunch with me, Selena. [00:40:20] Speaker B: Oh, stop. I loved that. I know. [00:40:23] Speaker A: It was so simple, sincere, and earnest. [00:40:26] Speaker B: I know. I know. And she was being so awful to him. [00:40:29] Speaker A: There is something about a man saying your name. [00:40:32] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:40:33] Speaker A: When, like, requesting something of you. [00:40:36] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:40:37] Speaker A: I have lunch with me, Selena. [00:40:38] Speaker B: I. I highlighted it, I bolded it, I underlined, italicized. I did everything. [00:40:45] Speaker A: That is what. That's where the bar is right now. But overall, I really like Sam as a main male character, he'. Kind, he's smart. He's not violent with her at all. [00:40:57] Speaker B: He goes. And he goes like, she's. He's like, I'm in no rush. He's like, you know, at the club and she's dancing, he's like, okay, have fun. I mean, he is a king. [00:41:10] Speaker A: He gives her the space she needs. [00:41:12] Speaker B: He gives the space. [00:41:13] Speaker A: He doesn't try and make her anything that she's not. [00:41:15] Speaker B: No. They've lived together in an apartment for months, and he's not pressuring her. No, I'm not ready. [00:41:21] Speaker A: And she goes out and she does her thing. She comes back, he leaves a note. He's like, I'll be back soon. [00:41:26] Speaker B: God. Oh, my God. If only. [00:41:29] Speaker A: This is why these books are famous. [00:41:31] Speaker B: I know. I know this one. I mean, he's a human, but he's the most fantastical of all of them. [00:41:37] Speaker A: I'm a little upset, though, that, like, we don't have more of him. [00:41:40] Speaker B: I know. [00:41:41] Speaker A: I am curious if we're gonna see more of Sam in this book series, and I asked that not only are we going to see more of him in the form of flashbacks, but are we going to see more of him in the form of whatever it is that Anne Darlin is cooking up with this weird magic that he's got going on. Like, at one point, I wondered if he was, like, going to do some resurrection with. With the magic that he's using. [00:42:06] Speaker B: Yeah. I gotta tell you, I looked it up. [00:42:09] Speaker A: Did you? [00:42:09] Speaker B: Yeah. He's not rescued. [00:42:10] Speaker A: Resurrection. Okay. Well, I mean, that's at least good. I don't want. I don't want a. Resurrected. Yeah, no, I don't want any like that. But it's sad because I fell for someone that we're never going to see again, but, you know, it's par for the course for me to fall for an unavailable man. [00:42:25] Speaker B: Unavailable. [00:42:26] Speaker A: That's what I do. [00:42:28] Speaker B: God. Yeah. He also, whenever. When he said she didn't want to tell him, she wasn't ready to tell him about, like, her past. And he goes. He goes, that's okay. It's. I'll be honored when you trust me enough to hear. [00:42:41] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. [00:42:42] Speaker B: He goes, it's not my business. It's not Airben's business. It's only your business. [00:42:45] Speaker A: Exactly. This is. This is a man written by women. [00:42:48] Speaker B: Yes, yes, I know that that cuts deep. I know. I know. [00:42:53] Speaker A: Unfortunately, I know it's. It's tough. [00:42:58] Speaker B: Yeah. When he saved her from the sewer. [00:43:01] Speaker A: Yeah. Now that was great. That was crazy. Now that invokes to me. I put this in my note. It invoked Images of the 1994 cinematic classic Shawshank Redemption. A classic in our home. [00:43:15] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah, Yeah. A classic. Oh, my God. [00:43:18] Speaker A: When Tim Robbins is running through the nasty ass sewer system of the prison, that's what it reminded me of. [00:43:27] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, my God. I know. That was, like, kind of a gross. [00:43:31] Speaker A: Scene, but it was terrible. [00:43:32] Speaker B: Yeah. When she was like. I felt things. [00:43:33] Speaker A: Oh, God. [00:43:34] Speaker B: She's underwater, and she's like. I don't know what's. [00:43:36] Speaker A: What's. [00:43:37] Speaker B: Yeah. Swirling around down there. [00:43:39] Speaker A: The amount of antibiotics that she would need to take in order to clear that out. Can't even think about it. Okay. That's what I got on Sam. You got anything else on Sam? [00:43:49] Speaker B: On Sam? I mean, just that, like, the first, like, when I fell in love with him. [00:43:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:43:55] Speaker B: Was when he was like. When he's like, you have no idea what I did all summer. And he was like, kind of like he couldn't believe that she had forgiven Arabin. And she was like, well, you did too. And he said my price was his oath that he'd never lay a hand on you again. I told him I'd forgive him in exchange for that, and I was like, God damn it. He dies. [00:44:17] Speaker A: Yeah, he dies. [00:44:19] Speaker B: It's so bad. [00:44:19] Speaker A: He's gone. [00:44:20] Speaker B: It's so bad. [00:44:21] Speaker A: Yeah, it's tough. [00:44:22] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:44:22] Speaker A: Sam Cortland, we hardly knew thee. [00:44:25] Speaker B: Yep. [00:44:27] Speaker A: Okay. Any. Any knots for you? You want us, or. Yeah, sure. [00:44:31] Speaker B: I mean, urban. [00:44:33] Speaker A: Absolutely. Let's talk about it. [00:44:34] Speaker B: He is. I mean, I. I just wrote slave trading number one. Number one. [00:44:40] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:44:41] Speaker B: Also spending all his money on Lysandra's bidding. [00:44:45] Speaker A: That is the grossest so gross thing ever. Yeah. Go ahead. [00:44:50] Speaker B: So Lysandra is, like. Like, she's turning 17. She's, like, being trained to be courtesan. A courtesan. Yeah. And so then, like, I guess they have this bidding when the. The. The woman turns 17, and they auction her off. And then. And even though Arabin, like, raised, helped. [00:45:14] Speaker A: Raise, he's basically been grooming her. He's basically been like a pageant mom, essentially, for her. [00:45:20] Speaker B: Stage mom. Yeah, he's her stage dad, and he bought her. [00:45:23] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:45:26] Speaker B: So that was really weird. Then the weird relationship he had with Selena. Yeah. Very, very weird. Like you. I kept being like, wait, does he hate her? Does he love her? Does he want to have sex with her? Like, what's going on? [00:45:37] Speaker A: That was a constant question, even she had throughout the book. [00:45:40] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. And then the other Leave it. I have. Is Selena's behavior towards Sam okay? [00:45:47] Speaker A: Yes, totally. So, going back to Araban for the. The. Leave it. I completely agree with you. I thought that what's interesting about him, too, all the things that you said, but Selena said that he's nearly 20 years her senior, so that means this man is not even 37 years old. [00:46:07] Speaker B: Okay, that was crazy. [00:46:10] Speaker A: That was crazy because I'm picturing him as, like, a silver hair. [00:46:13] Speaker B: Yeah, totally. [00:46:14] Speaker A: You know, person. [00:46:15] Speaker B: He's 55. [00:46:16] Speaker A: Yeah, right. Something like that. I also found it so strange she referred to him as father, brother, lover, because they hadn't quite defined the relationship. That's just a weird dynamic to have with somebody who, like, raised. Has raised you since the age of eight. [00:46:34] Speaker B: What's going on, Sarah? I mean, that and then the cousins. I don't know. [00:46:40] Speaker A: So, yeah, it was very weird. It felt to me like if this was any more of a depraved book, then that would have been explored a little bit. Maybe the pressure valve was like having him bid on Lysandra's virginity. You know what I mean? It's like, okay, well, if he's not gonna make a play for Selina, then we have to gross everybody out by his willingness and ability to bid on Lysandra, who's a fellow 17 year old, for her virginity, which was so gross. But also, he says about the Lysandra bidding, he says, I spent so much time basically grooming her, why shouldn't I enjoy the fruits of my labor? I don't think he said that. I think that's my. I think that's my. You know, I'm paraphrasing. But basically, he was like, why? [00:47:24] Speaker B: Why not? [00:47:25] Speaker A: I've basically invested in this. Why can't I, like, see the. See the value in it? You know what I mean? [00:47:32] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:47:35] Speaker A: It is weird that he told Baron at the end of the story that he, you know, did all of this to Selena because he doesn't like sharing his belongings. [00:47:45] Speaker B: I think he just wanted to kill Sam. [00:47:47] Speaker A: He absolutely. He's possessive. Yeah. They were never gonna get out of there. [00:47:50] Speaker B: Yeah, no, they were never gonna get out. I mean, unless they had just, like, ran away and not said anything, but. [00:47:56] Speaker A: Like, he would have absolutely tracked them down. [00:47:57] Speaker B: Yeah. But she also had, like. It still has a weird pull. [00:48:01] Speaker A: She has a very weird pull toward him. And I thought that that was, like, really exhausting because, like, even when they escape Skulls Bay, they come back and they get in trouble with him, essentially. She is so convinced. And this is a little bit in my, you know, leave it section. But Selena has this belief like she's got this blind loyalty to him and this belief that like she. She's his favorite and he would never hurt her and he's always going to save her. Even when she gets thrown in the royal dungeons at the end of the story, she believes that he's gonna come and save her. And apparently he. That was kind of the plan. Yeah, it was a plan before the king decided to send her to the salt mines. But he doesn't give a shit about her. [00:48:49] Speaker B: No, no, no, no. [00:48:50] Speaker A: And like, even when they come back from Skulls Bay and they're about to get beaten, Selena is fully confident that Arabin's about to beat Sam and not her. [00:48:59] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. I mean he told. She totally forgave him too. Like, can you imagine? [00:49:04] Speaker A: No. And Sam didn't even understand. [00:49:06] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:49:06] Speaker A: What the is your problem? And she can just be bought. [00:49:10] Speaker B: Yeah, I know. She was like, oh, I can go and like wear these fancy dresses. [00:49:14] Speaker A: And she's like, I love a luxury item. [00:49:18] Speaker B: I don't like it. [00:49:19] Speaker A: That was bad for me. I'm also going to mention here for things that I. Things that are hot. I'm going to do this back to back hot for me. Selena. I love that she stuck to her values and morals through each story. [00:49:36] Speaker B: Yep. [00:49:37] Speaker A: Freeing the fifth, the slaves, despite the retribution. I liked her. I do like her independence. You know, buying her own condo, not taking rent from Sam, even if she's broke because of her love of luxury. [00:49:48] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:49:49] Speaker A: I love the idea at the end of Teresin ancestors really providing her strength in the darkest moments and the message of finding courage in the dark. And you know, despite her busy schedule, the girl still finds time to read. Love it, love that. But on the flip side, you know, there's two sides to every coin. Selena is a. Is a. Leave it for me. Here's some notes I wrote about her. She in this book is a 16 year old, soon to be 17 year old, know it all, who thinks she can broker business deals in the name of a tycoon. She Sundays, I'm almost 17 and I can already wallop you. Imagine how good I'll be in a few years. Another thing that I think is delusional with her is that girl. There are no other female assassins in the keep, but she thinks everyone knows her solely because she's so good at her job. [00:50:40] Speaker B: Right, Right, right, right. Yeah, I know. It's like, no, they know you because you're the only 16 year old female assassin. Right. Like that is. Yeah. [00:50:49] Speaker A: You think you're better than all these. Forget it. [00:50:51] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:50:52] Speaker A: She also is just so irrational, and, like, she acts without thinking, and there's so many instances of that. So there's, like, her fighting, you know, Philip Donovan's bodyguard, even when he's telling her that she's wrong. Wesley get. Telling her girl, it's a trap, and her not even waiting for him to, like, tell her what's going on, and her just fully believing that she knows the plan, she knows she's smarter than everybody else, and then she gets her ass in trouble. And everybody knew she was so prideful and arrogant. [00:51:27] Speaker B: Erbin knew that was how she was gonna. [00:51:28] Speaker A: That they set all of those traps. [00:51:30] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:51:30] Speaker A: They knew she was gonna be stupid like that. [00:51:32] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:51:33] Speaker A: She's constantly referring to herself as in a darlin's assassin in the third person. She's constantly referring to herself as a darlin's assassin in third person. [00:51:43] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That is weird. [00:51:45] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:51:45] Speaker B: It's a little narcissistic. [00:51:47] Speaker A: I'm a darling's assassin. It's crazy. [00:51:49] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:51:50] Speaker A: She can't say I love you back to Sam. That's the biggest. [00:51:53] Speaker B: I mean, I. Yep, yep. That's what I wrote. [00:51:55] Speaker A: And also, she can't even let him use her fancy soaps. [00:52:00] Speaker B: I know. Oh, my God. Yeah. What the hell? How fancy can that be? [00:52:05] Speaker A: Just stupid as hell. I'm like, first of all, you don't deserve him. [00:52:08] Speaker B: No, no, no. Not at all. [00:52:11] Speaker A: No. Yeah. She just basically thinks she's smarter than everybody else. I just don't. She. I loved her. I hated her. [00:52:18] Speaker B: Yeah. No, I. I agree. I mean, there were. And that's the thing is, like, I was hoping that, like, the part that she was great will continue on in the series, but. No, I honestly think the leave it part really continues. [00:52:31] Speaker A: I think the leave it part continues. I think the leave part's coming back. I think the salt mines really bought some of that humility and whatnot. [00:52:38] Speaker B: Right. [00:52:38] Speaker A: And I'm not. Listen, listen. I'm not necessarily saying a woman needs to be stripped of everything in her life and beaten to a pulp in order to, like, you know, get some humility and, like, actually be a good person. That's not the path. But she is, like, she's starting to, like. I don't know. She just feels herself just. [00:52:54] Speaker B: Yes, yes, yes. [00:52:55] Speaker A: Like, she's arrogant to a point where it starts to become a. A detriment. [00:53:01] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. Like. Like a danger. [00:53:03] Speaker A: A danger. It's a risk. [00:53:04] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:04] Speaker A: To the whole operation. [00:53:06] Speaker B: I mean, I don't. I don't know where that comes from. Like, oh, my God, Sam was such a beautiful human being, such a good human being. They both went through a lot. Yeah. [00:53:16] Speaker A: I love another continuance of babe. Supporting babes in the story. [00:53:20] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:21] Speaker A: Irene Towers tending to Selena's wounds after she saves Irene from the mercenary attack. We love that. That was a boring story, but I did like that story. We talked a little bit about that. And despite my hate for angel, she gave. She gave angel more time to escape. She let angel live. [00:53:38] Speaker B: She did. Which I do not like. [00:53:40] Speaker A: I didn't like that either. [00:53:41] Speaker B: She should have killed her. [00:53:42] Speaker A: I know she's gonna kill her. [00:53:44] Speaker B: I know. Especially. Yeah. Like, and then. And Ansel was going to kill the King, and she did kill her boyfriend. Who was the boyfriend's name? What was the boy? [00:53:52] Speaker A: Miguel. [00:53:53] Speaker B: Mikhail. [00:53:54] Speaker A: Who seemed like he had, you know, potential. [00:53:58] Speaker B: Well, I don't know about that. He was, like, 25. [00:54:01] Speaker A: And she was like, oh, you're right. Thank you for that reminder. Yeah. I hate that. And I also. My last love is Silent Assassins of the Red Desert. The Sazi Sukast. Oh, the Sazi Suicast. [00:54:14] Speaker B: I did like that whole. That whole, like, scene. [00:54:17] Speaker A: Yeah, it's very, very. Yeah, I loved it. [00:54:23] Speaker B: I got, like, some Batman vibes from that. Like, basically, like, I think there was some movie where he went to, like, med. He went to, like, I don't know, far away, to, like, a meditation center. Who? Christian Bale. [00:54:40] Speaker A: Christian Bale. [00:54:41] Speaker B: Yeah. In the. In a Batman movie. It was like, the second. [00:54:44] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. He was down in the pit. [00:54:48] Speaker B: No, no, that was a. It was a. Maybe the second one or maybe it's the first one. I don't know. We gotta check that. [00:54:55] Speaker A: Like, 20 years ago, I was. I was getting. Yeah. His movies. Christian Bale's Batman movies were, like, 20 years ago. [00:55:02] Speaker B: I can't. I can't. I'm leaving. [00:55:03] Speaker A: The. The Heath Ledger one came out in 2008. [00:55:06] Speaker B: No, no. [00:55:08] Speaker A: Yeah, 2007. 2008. I think it came out 2008 after he had passed. [00:55:13] Speaker B: Did you know that it's 2025? [00:55:15] Speaker A: I'm very aware that it's 2025. Every day. Every day I was getting. I kept thinking about Dune. [00:55:25] Speaker B: Okay. Yep. I thought that same thing. [00:55:27] Speaker A: Yeah, that's what I was thinking of. But I just thought it was such a beautiful. The way it was written and described. Like, the trek across the Red desert. The idea of the singing sands in harmony to avoid quicksand. Ilias sounded beautiful. He's Tan skin with beautiful blue eyes. [00:55:43] Speaker B: Oh, the. The sun. Yeah, absolutely. [00:55:46] Speaker A: The master. I just loved all of that. Yeah. So those were some hots. I do have both honorable mentions and dishonorable mentions if you want to hear that. [00:55:55] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:55:56] Speaker A: Okay. Honorable mentions. I don't know if I hate or love this. I hate and love it. Selena walking around that damn mask. [00:56:04] Speaker B: Oh, I hated that. That was weird. That was really weird. [00:56:08] Speaker A: It's giving. Going back to Batman. It's giving. Bane from. [00:56:11] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:56:13] Speaker A: From Batman 2012. [00:56:15] Speaker B: It's giving red light mask. [00:56:16] Speaker A: Mask. It's a red light mask. But not the benefits. No, no, no. It's. No, she's like, it. It contorts my voice. [00:56:24] Speaker B: Yeah. And it's like, no, it doesn't. [00:56:27] Speaker A: Very weird. Then she'd be like, I'm sweating under this thing. [00:56:29] Speaker B: Yeah, I know. And it's like, Roth knew exactly who. Yeah. That you were like a 16 year old girl. [00:56:34] Speaker A: I feel like everybody's just walking around her being like, okay, I guess we're gonna. We're just gonna pretend. Pretend? [00:56:39] Speaker B: Yeah. You're gonna pretend for her. [00:56:43] Speaker A: Everybody's in on it but her. [00:56:45] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:56:46] Speaker A: Donovan. I've already talked about this. The Quaker abolitionist. We loved him. Now he and his ex wife. Leifer. Is that her name? [00:56:54] Speaker B: Yes. [00:56:54] Speaker A: Bardingale. It reminded me a little bit of Bill and Linda Gates or Jeff and McKenzie Bezos. You know, they're both wealthy. Explore exes. [00:57:04] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:57:05] Speaker A: That do not. With each other. [00:57:06] Speaker B: Yeah. Okay. No, I can see that. [00:57:09] Speaker A: Yeah, that's what it was giving me. [00:57:11] Speaker B: Okay. [00:57:11] Speaker A: The. The wife and the husband. Very wealthy as a couple. [00:57:15] Speaker B: Right, right. [00:57:15] Speaker A: And hate each other. [00:57:17] Speaker B: Hate each other. [00:57:17] Speaker A: Divorced and hate each other. [00:57:19] Speaker B: I can see that. But like, it's definitely not Jeff Bezos because Jeff Bezos is not giving. What, the apple? [00:57:25] Speaker A: Oh, no, I'm not thinking necessarily, like, you know. [00:57:28] Speaker B: Right. [00:57:28] Speaker A: Okay. [00:57:30] Speaker B: But just like relationally. [00:57:31] Speaker A: Just relationally. Okay. Yeah. Probably more Melinda Gates than. [00:57:36] Speaker B: Probably more. Love her. [00:57:38] Speaker A: Mackenzie's like, let me get my. Let me go ahead and write these checks for everybody. [00:57:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:57:42] Speaker A: Melinda's doing the same. But I think Melinda's also like, let me just live my life in peace. [00:57:47] Speaker B: Right. She's like, all right, see ya. [00:57:48] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. And then also, listen, you know, I love a little cameo in a book. I love the run in with a masked Dorian and Kale. [00:57:57] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. Okay. Did you love that? Because I kind of hated that. [00:58:01] Speaker A: Did you? [00:58:01] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, because she was like. Like, she was like dancing in front of Sam and it was like, there's obviously something going on between you two. [00:58:09] Speaker A: I mean, I'm not necessarily thinking about that moment. I'm thinking a little bit about when they first showed up, and it was like, oh, you know who that is. [00:58:16] Speaker B: Right? Right, right, right. [00:58:17] Speaker A: Yeah. But I get what you're saying. [00:58:18] Speaker B: Kale. I just can't stand Kale. [00:58:20] Speaker A: I don't get how she ever fell in love with him. [00:58:23] Speaker B: He's so boring. [00:58:24] Speaker A: I'm like, okay, now I. The person that you should have been with is Dorian. [00:58:29] Speaker B: Yeah. You've got all three of those guys here. You don't protect Sam at the end. You don't. You, like, end up with Kale. It's absurd. [00:58:38] Speaker A: Kale, of all people. [00:58:39] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:58:40] Speaker A: And listen, also, honorable mention. If a man is not handsome, Selena Sardothian's gonna tell you. [00:58:46] Speaker B: Oh, my. [00:58:49] Speaker A: You don't have to. You don't have to guess or wonder, babe. She's gonna let you know straight up that that man is not attractive. [00:58:55] Speaker B: Who is it? Who are you talking about? [00:58:56] Speaker A: Every man, basically, in this book. [00:58:58] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:58:59] Speaker A: She's. [00:58:59] Speaker B: She's basically like, either he's the best looking man, she'll tell you if he's. [00:59:02] Speaker A: Good looking, and she'll tell you if he's not good looking, and she'll basically use those terms. She'll be like, not good looking, but nice. [00:59:08] Speaker B: Yeah. But very nice. Yeah. [00:59:10] Speaker A: Kind. For my knots, we talked about dishonorable mentions. [00:59:15] Speaker B: You ready? Dishonorable. Yep. [00:59:17] Speaker A: Slavery. I. I mean, we called it out. Ralph again. I'm keeping him in a holding pin, but he says something about, like, we just keep them. Them washed and fed. No, cancel. Cancel it. You know, I just don't like the girls that don't get it. The girls that aren't girls. Girls. Lissandra. I think her name was Jessa. She's like the bar keep in. That works with her. [00:59:44] Speaker B: Yep. [00:59:45] Speaker A: And most notably, Angel. [00:59:47] Speaker B: Yeah, she was the worst. [00:59:49] Speaker A: No, we got to stick together. You can't sell me out. [00:59:52] Speaker B: Yeah. And both. They were both coming from families, like, where they were killed by the king. Like, the parents were killed by the king. And yet Ansel is like a. Yeah. [01:00:00] Speaker A: Psychopath. [01:00:00] Speaker B: Psychopath. [01:00:01] Speaker A: She's on, like, a war rampage also. Economic turmoil everywhere. Arena can't afford college. Magics destroyed lands and chaos. I think it sounds a little familiar. [01:00:12] Speaker B: Yeah, definitely. Definitely. [01:00:14] Speaker A: Especially the lost magic along around the land. [01:00:17] Speaker B: Arena needs to get a private scholarship. Yeah. [01:00:22] Speaker A: She's got to take out massive amounts alone. 31 interest. You know what I did not like, I was uncomfortable with. There's a bit of a Silent disco at the Assassin's Keep. This. The silent Assassin's Keep. [01:00:36] Speaker B: I remember that. [01:00:37] Speaker A: It was the Midsummer Eve celebration. I did not like that. [01:00:39] Speaker B: I didn't like it either. [01:00:40] Speaker A: I'm like, y' all are just moving. You're just moving your bodies. It was very cultish. You're just gyrating your bodies in silence. [01:00:46] Speaker B: Yes, yes, yes. It was very. I know. It wasn't like. It was like, okay, we all have the same earphones on and the same music playing. Like, that would have been something, but. [01:00:54] Speaker A: They didn't even have a man in the corner playing a ukulele or whatever. [01:00:57] Speaker B: I. I can't. Not even a spoken word poet. [01:01:00] Speaker A: A kazoo. At least a harmonica or something in there. [01:01:07] Speaker B: Recorder, a harp. [01:01:13] Speaker A: A little banjo, Something. A drum. At least a drum. Those people have drums? [01:01:19] Speaker B: Those people have drums for sure. [01:01:23] Speaker A: I also. We've talked about this, Lissandra, in the entire bidding concept for courtesans. End it. Escaping through the sewer like Shawshank Redemption, only to go back and have a hot makeout session with Sam. [01:01:35] Speaker B: Okay, okay. That was concerning. I mean, loved the session, loved Sam. But, like, that was very. I was like, get out of there. [01:01:43] Speaker A: It smells the way. I would not want to be seen by that man for two weeks. I'd be in a hazmat suit. [01:01:50] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [01:01:51] Speaker A: Like, just complete biohazard. [01:01:53] Speaker B: And she was like, I took a bath, like, eight times. And I was like, okay, not enough of all. [01:01:57] Speaker A: I want to be flayed. Yeah, you said that you burned me in a man while he's still alive. Skin me, skin me. [01:02:05] Speaker B: Cut your hair off. Everything. [01:02:07] Speaker A: Everything. I want no traces. [01:02:09] Speaker B: Oh, man, that was bad. But that's how they do it back. [01:02:13] Speaker A: Then, I guess, in the good old days. And then finally, our girl Casita. I hope we see her again. [01:02:20] Speaker B: I hope we see her again, too. [01:02:22] Speaker A: How do you pronounce it? [01:02:23] Speaker B: I thought cassida. [01:02:24] Speaker A: I'm like, casita. [01:02:25] Speaker B: Casita. [01:02:27] Speaker A: This cultural. Cultural difference. [01:02:31] Speaker B: It's the correct way to pronounce it. [01:02:33] Speaker A: Yeah. Casita. And you're like, well, that's that. [01:02:41] Speaker B: That's that, I guess. Anything else? [01:02:43] Speaker A: No. I loved it. [01:02:44] Speaker B: I did, too. [01:02:45] Speaker A: Let me tell you this. I don't. You know, castings for this are sporadic for me. [01:02:50] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:02:52] Speaker A: What is Farron. [01:02:53] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:02:54] Speaker A: Okay. [01:02:54] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:02:55] Speaker A: Faran. I have a really hard time picturing any of these people as, like, 20 years old. You know what I mean? [01:03:02] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [01:03:03] Speaker A: You know who I thought about for Ferran? Because it, like, described his hair as being slick back in some way. [01:03:10] Speaker B: Yep. [01:03:11] Speaker A: I just pictured him as being like, weird because he's into weird things. [01:03:14] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. [01:03:17] Speaker A: Is. Is his name Crispin Glover? [01:03:20] Speaker B: Yeah, Crispin Glover. Oh, God. [01:03:22] Speaker A: I thought he could be good. [01:03:24] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [01:03:25] Speaker A: I also thought. What is the guy who plays. He's a. He plays it. Oh, Bill Skarsgard. [01:03:38] Speaker B: Bill Skarsgard. Oh, my God. He could. Yep. [01:03:41] Speaker A: He would play a very good one. [01:03:43] Speaker B: Even Colin Farrell. [01:03:46] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:03:47] Speaker B: Because he plays a good villain. [01:03:48] Speaker A: He does play. [01:03:49] Speaker B: Maybe he's like. But like, I feel like he's not like creepy enough. [01:03:52] Speaker A: He's not creepy enough. Yeah, See, he's so sexy that I'm almost like he needs to be Araban. [01:03:56] Speaker B: I know. Oh, he could be Arabin, though. Is described as like silver eyes and like auburn hair. [01:04:03] Speaker A: We can put some contacts. We could put some contacts in Colin for sure. [01:04:06] Speaker B: Yeah, he would be a good. Yeah, he wouldn't be a good airman. [01:04:11] Speaker A: You know? [01:04:12] Speaker B: You know who he was on a. [01:04:15] Speaker A: Talk show this week again, you know, I have the TV watching Habits of a Stay at Home mom in the 90s. And we talked about this when we kicked off this season that it's the 30th anniversary of the film Clueless. A now 30 year older, Jeremy Sisto. [01:04:33] Speaker B: Wait, is that the. [01:04:34] Speaker A: He played. [01:04:37] Speaker B: Ties. [01:04:39] Speaker A: You know who he played? [01:04:41] Speaker B: Elton, who did a Rolling with. [01:04:43] Speaker A: Yeah, rolling with the homies. Yes. [01:04:46] Speaker B: Okay. Elton was a love of my life at that age. [01:04:50] Speaker A: Well, I. I love to tell you he still is. [01:04:52] Speaker B: Jesus. [01:04:54] Speaker A: Very good looking. [01:04:55] Speaker B: Oh, okay, okay. [01:04:57] Speaker A: I could see him. [01:04:58] Speaker B: I don't know. [01:04:59] Speaker A: No, I mean, that's not doing him justice. [01:05:01] Speaker B: Okay, okay, okay. [01:05:02] Speaker A: That's not doing him justice. [01:05:04] Speaker B: Okay. [01:05:04] Speaker A: But get him in a costume. [01:05:06] Speaker B: There's something about those eyes. Yeah, I could see that. [01:05:10] Speaker A: All I'm telling you is I cast him from my couch in this role. [01:05:13] Speaker B: Okay. And. And with Arabin. Yeah, okay, I can see that. [01:05:17] Speaker A: I'm putting him in there. Even though we're supposed to believe that this man is 37 years old. Whatever. [01:05:21] Speaker B: I know. You know what, though? That, that kind of made him scarier, though, that he was younger. Just like in Creepier. [01:05:29] Speaker A: I find it creepier that he would buy a young girl's virginity at 17 when he's older. [01:05:34] Speaker B: That's true. [01:05:35] Speaker A: I think being a 36 year old and being a creep for a 17 year old, really, I mean, like, you see that coming the mile away. [01:05:40] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, Right, Right, right, right, right. [01:05:42] Speaker A: Personally. [01:05:43] Speaker B: Yeah, totally. Yeah, I know. [01:05:46] Speaker A: Moral of the story, can't trust men. No, no, they'll buy your virginity. They'll sell you into slavery. [01:05:53] Speaker B: It's not all men, but it's always. [01:05:54] Speaker A: A somehow, some way. All right. [01:06:01] Speaker B: Is that it? Should we. [01:06:03] Speaker A: Do you want to do mash? [01:06:04] Speaker B: Let's do mash. Okay. [01:06:06] Speaker A: I will be typing. Yeah. For you. [01:06:09] Speaker B: Okay. You want to type? [01:06:10] Speaker A: Yeah, I'll type. [01:06:11] Speaker B: Can you do that? Or do you want to put your. Your mic on the sand? [01:06:15] Speaker A: Yeah, that's a great idea. [01:06:16] Speaker B: Put the mic on the sand. [01:06:20] Speaker A: Listen. And we're doing this thing in the middle of a comedy club tonight, so if anybody hears any sound. Sounds on the background, just know you're getting us live, baby. This is where the action happens. [01:06:30] Speaker B: It's just some ambient noise I love. [01:06:33] Speaker A: Like, I think it. [01:06:34] Speaker B: It adds something. [01:06:35] Speaker A: It adds something. Yeah. It gives us a little bit of street cred. [01:06:38] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. We don't even need to put the laugh track on. [01:06:42] Speaker A: God, no. [01:06:43] Speaker B: Look at. [01:06:44] Speaker A: Look at Christian. His headphones. He's in the DJ booth. [01:06:48] Speaker B: He's opening up some candy back here. I love it. [01:06:52] Speaker A: Okay, here we go. So you know where we start? Where's your mansion? [01:06:57] Speaker B: Mansion? Rich hold. [01:06:59] Speaker A: Come on. RIFT hold. They got great property. [01:07:03] Speaker B: I mean, they do. They really do. [01:07:05] Speaker A: Apartment. [01:07:08] Speaker B: God, I don't know. The waist. Isn't that a thing? [01:07:11] Speaker A: Okay. Love that. Where's your shack? [01:07:15] Speaker B: The vault. [01:07:16] Speaker A: The vault. Vaults. [01:07:18] Speaker B: Which is, I guess, in rifold, but. RIFT hold. But do you remember the vault? [01:07:22] Speaker A: Yeah. Apartment complex. I thought the vault was a nightclub. [01:07:25] Speaker B: It is. Well, it's everything. [01:07:27] Speaker A: So you can basically have a cot. [01:07:28] Speaker B: Yes. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. [01:07:32] Speaker A: Where's your house? [01:07:34] Speaker B: Red Desert. [01:07:35] Speaker A: Love that. Made out of some red clay. Yeah. [01:07:40] Speaker B: Little Arizona ranch house. [01:07:42] Speaker A: No, we love. Love that. Okay, give me your men. [01:07:45] Speaker B: My men. Okay. Definitely first Sam Cortland. I am saying Cortland. I will not be afraid. [01:07:52] Speaker A: Love that. Okay. [01:07:54] Speaker B: My next would be Elias. [01:07:56] Speaker A: Yes. Okay. [01:08:00] Speaker B: God, I don't even know. Who else do we have? Wesley. I'll go with Wesley. [01:08:04] Speaker A: Okay. [01:08:05] Speaker B: He was not bad. [01:08:06] Speaker A: You thought that he was bad, but he really wasn't. [01:08:09] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:08:10] Speaker A: Did she kill him or. No, no, she knocked him out. [01:08:12] Speaker B: He. No, she knocked him out, but, like, we had heard about him when she was talking to Kale, and basically, he. After they captured Selena, Wesley went to kill Ferran. [01:08:26] Speaker A: That's right. [01:08:27] Speaker B: To. To avenge Sam. [01:08:28] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:08:29] Speaker B: And then they killed him. [01:08:31] Speaker A: Damn. [01:08:32] Speaker B: Yeah. Like. Like push him. Him off a building, and then he, like, basically, like, landed on a iron fence. [01:08:40] Speaker A: Good Lord. [01:08:41] Speaker B: Yeah, that's. That's where we were. Yeah. [01:08:43] Speaker A: Okay, well, I forgot all about that. But Wesley, may he rest in peace. [01:08:47] Speaker B: I know. [01:08:48] Speaker A: Next. [01:08:51] Speaker B: Should I. Should I go with Ralph? [01:08:53] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:08:54] Speaker B: Just the potential. [01:08:56] Speaker A: I will let you know. If you enter into a relationship with him, it is the end the of. Of our friendship. [01:09:04] Speaker B: All right. [01:09:06] Speaker A: Okay. Tell me your strange familial connection. Who and how are you related? [01:09:11] Speaker B: Okay, let's do father, brother, father, lover. You know what? How about just whatever she said about. About Arabin. So, like, how about what's undecided? No. Okay. Familial connection. Okay. Okay. A father's best friend. [01:09:44] Speaker A: Who's your father's best friend? So tell me, a person and how are you related? [01:09:49] Speaker B: Oh, a person. [01:09:50] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:09:51] Speaker B: Okay. But a person other than, like, Elias. [01:09:53] Speaker A: And it could be anybody. [01:09:54] Speaker B: Oh, it could be anybody. Okay. [01:09:56] Speaker A: We're making this. We can make this as crazy and twisted as possible. [01:09:59] Speaker B: Oh, okay. Father's best friend. I don't want to say him. [01:10:04] Speaker A: Okay, so other. You know, we got other characters. [01:10:07] Speaker B: Okay. In my life or in their life in the book. [01:10:11] Speaker A: So who are you related to? And pick a character in the book. And how are the two of you related? [01:10:15] Speaker B: So, like, let's say if you. If I was related to Ansel, huh? Then it would be my, like, I. I don't know. The. The barista, the. The coffee shop that I go to. I don't understand this. [01:10:31] Speaker A: Are you cousins? [01:10:33] Speaker B: I guess. Do we have to have a familiar? [01:10:35] Speaker A: That's the familial connection. [01:10:36] Speaker B: Here we go. Yeah. [01:10:38] Speaker A: Okay. Okay. Who are you related to next? And how are you related? [01:10:44] Speaker B: How about Doneval? [01:10:48] Speaker A: Okay. [01:10:49] Speaker B: And he is my uncle. [01:10:53] Speaker A: Okay, great. [01:10:56] Speaker B: What else? How about Arene? [01:11:00] Speaker A: Okay. [01:11:02] Speaker B: And she's my second cousin. [01:11:03] Speaker A: Okay, great. [01:11:05] Speaker B: And then I will go with h. I guess. I guess. Who was the. Who was the, like, the slave that, like, got everybody out? You know what I mean? Like, that spoke the. The common tongue. I don't remember his name. Okay. [01:11:25] Speaker A: I feel bad. I don't remember his name either. My Black King. [01:11:28] Speaker B: Yeah, just put that there. [01:11:32] Speaker A: Yes. And how are you related? [01:11:35] Speaker B: He's my dad. [01:11:37] Speaker A: Got it. What is his name? [01:11:39] Speaker B: I know. I feel bad, honestly. I don't know if she's ever said the name. No. [01:11:44] Speaker A: What about the master being your. Being your dad? [01:11:48] Speaker B: What do you mean? Like Ralph. The master. [01:11:51] Speaker A: The master from the Silent Keep. [01:11:53] Speaker B: Oh, you mean the king. Not a master. [01:11:55] Speaker A: Yes, she kept calling a master the master. [01:11:58] Speaker B: Oh, okay. Okay, then. Yeah, yeah. Mutual king. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of the assassins. [01:12:02] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. Because she kept referring to him as the master. [01:12:06] Speaker B: Oh, okay. Okay. Like a little bit of Karate Kid. Okay. [01:12:09] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, I think so. Okay. Occupation. [01:12:13] Speaker B: Okay. We're gonna go pirate. [01:12:15] Speaker A: Okay. [01:12:17] Speaker B: We're gonna go barmaid. [01:12:18] Speaker A: Okay. [01:12:20] Speaker B: We're gonna go dancer at the club. Yep. Remember those girls on swing? [01:12:24] Speaker A: Yep. [01:12:26] Speaker B: And then what else is. Royal Guard. [01:12:31] Speaker A: Royal Guard. There's security in that great pension. [01:12:36] Speaker B: No, puny Sandhar. [01:12:38] Speaker A: Okay. [01:12:39] Speaker B: Yep. [01:12:41] Speaker A: Let's see. Tell me about your. Do you want to do dormant magical manifestation? [01:12:47] Speaker B: Okay, sure. This has to be, like, not real or, like, not part of the book. [01:12:55] Speaker A: It could be whatever. [01:12:56] Speaker B: Okay. Okay. I did think about this today. What if you, like, you could just, like, eject wheels out of the bottom. [01:13:06] Speaker A: Of your feet, like wheelies. Okay. Okay, cool. [01:13:13] Speaker B: And then something like the manon, when you can, like, I guess, like, hurt the iron teeth come out. [01:13:22] Speaker A: Okay. [01:13:23] Speaker B: So let's just do some gold teeth that come out. [01:13:26] Speaker A: Okay. Gold. Not iron, not iron. Okay, great. [01:13:31] Speaker B: And then I guess wings. [01:13:34] Speaker A: Okay. Just wings. Love that. Do they work? [01:13:39] Speaker B: They work. Yeah. They're dormant. They're. Yeah. And then I. I mean, I guess that you have, like, a beautiful singing voice, which, honestly could just be living. A human living. [01:13:52] Speaker A: Yeah. Maybe the musical singing voice lures men to their death. [01:13:56] Speaker B: Yes. [01:13:57] Speaker A: You're a siren. Love it. Okay, great. Okay. Tell me how many magical sprites that you have in your keep. [01:14:11] Speaker B: Magical sprites? Yeah. Okay. [01:14:13] Speaker A: Or like the little people. You know, when she's going through the oak walled forest and there's people. [01:14:17] Speaker B: Oh. Oh, my gosh. Okay. How about 197? [01:14:21] Speaker A: Okay. [01:14:23] Speaker B: Three. Sure. Just some besties, you know, one. [01:14:29] Speaker A: Okay. [01:14:30] Speaker B: And 2,000. [01:14:34] Speaker A: Maybe I'll change that category to how many assassins are in your keep. [01:14:37] Speaker B: Yeah. Okay. [01:14:38] Speaker A: So this is assassin. [01:14:39] Speaker B: Yeah. Okay. [01:14:40] Speaker A: Just keep on theme. Okay. Christian, Christian or resident Warlock number between 1 and 10. 4. Got it. Thank you. Okay, here we go. Got your future. You have a shack or a caught in the vault? [01:15:00] Speaker B: In the vault. Okay. [01:15:01] Speaker A: It's not forever. [01:15:02] Speaker B: No. [01:15:02] Speaker A: You're working way up. [01:15:04] Speaker B: Yeah. Yep. [01:15:05] Speaker A: Your man is Ilya. Oh, okay. [01:15:09] Speaker B: Quiet. [01:15:10] Speaker A: The strong and silent. [01:15:11] Speaker B: Yeah, the strong and silent type. [01:15:12] Speaker A: Love to see it. You are related to Irene. She's your second cousin. [01:15:18] Speaker B: Okay. Okay. Normal. [01:15:20] Speaker A: Yeah. You are a pirate. [01:15:24] Speaker B: Oh, that's why I'm a cot. Yeah, exactly. [01:15:29] Speaker A: And you have gold teeth that come out. [01:15:31] Speaker B: Okay, that is on brand. [01:15:33] Speaker A: Yeah. Love that I see it. I mean, and you have 197 assassins. [01:15:37] Speaker B: Okay, okay. I'm living. [01:15:40] Speaker A: I see nothing wrong. [01:15:41] Speaker B: That is great. [01:15:42] Speaker A: This is just living high on the hog. [01:15:44] Speaker B: I mean, I might want to save for a down payment, but, you know, you're getting there. I love it. Love that Manuki. His mouth shut. [01:15:51] Speaker A: Yeah, man, he keeps his mouth shut. You got gold teeth. 197. Damn assassin friends love it. And you live in a speakeasy. [01:16:00] Speaker B: Love it. [01:16:01] Speaker A: Yeah, it's not up to code, but it's home. Love that. [01:16:06] Speaker B: Yeah. I think we're done. [01:16:08] Speaker A: I think so. Well, thank you so much for listening. We always appreciate you coming by and tuning in to hear listening to yap. [01:16:18] Speaker B: Yep. [01:16:19] Speaker A: Please, wherever you listen to our podcast, if you're feeling the vibe, rate and subscribe, please. [01:16:26] Speaker B: Five. Five stars. [01:16:27] Speaker A: Five stars, please. Nothing less. I don't think our hearts can take it. [01:16:32] Speaker B: And thank you to Christian McCann, somebody who keeps our sound in check. Crazy in at bay. And the illustrious Lincoln Law Lodge in Chicago, Illinois. [01:16:45] Speaker A: Yeah. Until next time. [01:16:46] Speaker B: Yeah. See you later. [01:16:48] Speaker A: See you later. Bye. [01:16:48] Speaker B: Bye.